Sex Is Not OK In A Christian Relationship Before Marriage…Or Is It??

If you are involved in a Christian dating relationship you are surely tempted toward a more physical relationship. You love your partner and want to express that love. However, the Bible is very clear about God's command to avoid sexual immorality. That includes all forms of sex outside of marriage.

God does not leave any doubt about His view of sex before marriage. In His Word, He speaks repeatedly against sexual immorality. Romans 1:29, Colossians 3:5, Galatians 5:19 and Jude chapter 7 all address the issue of immorality.

The Bible even goes so far as to say that Christians should avoid even a hint at immorality. While the Bible does not define what that hint is, we know that we are to avoid even the appearance of evil. An onlooker needs to be able to tell the difference between a Christian dating relationship and a secular dating relationship. If a Christian couple is 'all over each other', then to the world, they appear to be involved in an immoral relationship.

God's word strictly forbids sexual relations outside of marriage. It does not, however, forbid all sexual relations. God is glorified when a man and a woman enjoy each other sexually inside of a Christian marriage.

God created sex. He created sex to be pleasurable and enjoyable. This is part of the reason that premarital sex has become so common today. Many dating couples, even Christian dating couples treat God's gift of sex as a recreational plaything. Because they enjoy it, they do it.

This is a distortion of the purpose for which sex was intended. God created sex for reproduction, not sport. That is why sex before marriage is forbidden by God. It is not to deny us the pleasure, but to avoid the pain of unwanted and poorly timed pregnancies. It also helps us steer clear of the emotional pain and guilt that comes when a sexual relationship ends.

Christian dating should strive to avoid this kind of pain and guilt.

If sex was contained inside marriages only, just as God planned, the world would be a better place. There would be few or no sexually transmitted diseases and no unmarried mothers unless they were widowed. There would also be fewer unwanted babies born and abortion would be a rare or unheard of thing.

So if sex before marriage is out of the question, how far can a Christian dating couple go in their physical relationship?
This goes back to the Christian dating couple avoiding even the hint of immorality spoken of in Ephesians. While the Bible does not say exactly what physical contact is permissible in a Christian dating relationship, we know that sex is out of the question. And most physical contact in a relationship is designed to get a couple ready for sex.

A Christian dating couple should limit their physical contact to things that are not meant to stimulate their partner sexually. This helps keep both members of the Christian dating relationship pure in thought and deed. When a Christian dating couple holds hands or gives light kisses, they can express their love for one another without overly arousing the sexual desire of their partner.

Remember, the more that a Christian dating couple saves to share exclusively with one another inside their marriage, the more special that physical relationship will be.

So if a Christian dating couple wants to express their love for one another they should keep it light. They should avoid the kind of physical contact that will stir sexual desire to help each other remain pure and close to God. This will lead to a happier Christian marriage.